When in the Lady bars (really it should be just bar… but I am trying to remain hopefully), shopping in grocery stores, drinking coffee downtown and looking at the gorgeous women one thing comes to mind “Is she Vanilla or Chocolate?” We all have are own individual sexual style and being with a woman is so wonderful in itself it is hard to describe or put into words the magic of lesbian love-making. There are an infinite amount of ways lesbians can have sex, and we have a variety of women to experience sex with, bisexual, woman who enjoy sex with other women (no label necessary), queer women, and lesbian transgender. Here are some reasons why lady loving is so fantastic: The roles can be switched up, back and forth. We can be dominant and in control (ripping her clothes off against a wall) then completely submissive and gentle (soft kisses and caresses). Because of the way are bodies are shaped and created we are free to do whatever are imagination allows us. Playing, switching and trying different roles is empowering and exciting! Of course there is the big “O” for orgasm. Women do not need to recharge or stop we can keep on going, it is like we are powered up with batteries! Non-stop sex sessions are common amongst lesbians compared to heterosexuals (one more reason why we are so special!). Then, there is just something about watching a women get off that is unreal and incredibly sexy. It is a powerful surge of energy that can make the darkest of days find light. A woman’s body is soft, so soft it is where we find security and warmth. There is nothing on this planet that can compare to the beauty of a naked women, artist throughout the centuries have attempted to capture it but never emulated it! The best part is that sometimes you find a woman who is completely linked to your sexual stamina, and our able to explore and experience sex in an open and like-minded way. However, with that said some of us opt for a more traditional, sweet, and soft approach (Vanilla), where as other girls like it hot, sexy, and hard (Chocolate). What determines our sexual energy or expressing of love? Is the way we get naked and rub up all over each other a representation of who we are? Some people put a lot of value on who you are by how we do it, but truly, how you have sex tells a lot about how you feel about yourself. It shows your confidence, maturity level and intimacy skill. Do you like it with the lights on or off? Public or behind closed doors? Upside down or missionary? Are you just a giver, taker or both? Are you happy with how you feel as a sexual being or is it uncomfortable? Depending on how you answer the questions will determine how you express yourself in bed and how the other lady will mirror it back. Being physical can make us feel vulnerable and exposed, that is part of the process of connecting with another human being. The healthier your own self-image and confidence the more wonderful experiences you will attract, therefore good sex starts with self (and I mean that literally too…. that is the next article!). Once you have that down, then the rest is all about fun and expressing yourself. So what do you think you are, Vanilla or Chocolate? Personally, I have always sided towards dark bitter-sweet chocolate! Alex Karydi~The Lesbian Guru I am an Internationally Certified Drug and Alcohol Counselor that has been trained in Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual and Transgender LGBT related issues. I write for the Examiner.com as their Lesbian Relationship Expert and am a featured writer on SexGenderBody.com. My intention is to start a movement towards a healthier and more supportive community! Where LGBTs can find each other, learn from one another, and build a stronger support system. I, myself, am on a personal quest in discovery for a healthier gay relationship and self-fulfillment. Follow me on my Blog http://TheLesbianGuru.com or just Join The Lesbian Revolution of Health & Love on http://Facebook.com/TheFemmeGuru Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Alex_Karydi

What an adverse and indispensable emotion pain can be. It can make us physically sick to our stomachs, want to quit, lose interest and feel lost and utterly confused. At the same time it balances out our perception and makes us uncomfortable enough in our shells to provoke change.

It is amazing the amount of pain another person can inflict on us, without reason or doubt. It is even more disturbing how we can allow that same pain to thrive within us without fighting, questioning, or walking away. Where does this loss of self occur, on what level do we stop caring about ourselves and allow the victim in us to take over?

Read the rest of this entry »

“I thought I was all alone. I thought the world had turned its back on me. I stopped caring. I stopped believing in a love and began hiding for safety. All along you were beside me, fighting for me, showing your face to free me when all had been deafened by hate. I see you now, standing in front of me. Together we will change the angered walls into a roads of hope. My family. My friend.” When I was 6 years old I had this massive crush on a girl named Victoria. She was so sweet and kind, I did not want to leave her side, she was my best friend. I remember telling my mom that I was in love with Victoria and that one day I would marry and take care of her. My mother smiled at me and gently whispered “that is a long ways away but I bet you will do a good job!” My mom did not stop there, when I came out to her at 12 years old and told her I had all these feelings about being with a girl (actually I had already being experimenting, sorry mama!), again she surprised me with “love is a powerful emotion and you do not get to choose the direction it is grown in but you have the power to make it beautiful with whomever you feel it with.” If it was not for her acceptance and love, I do not believe I would be as proud of who I am today. That understanding and support is why I am comfortable in my skin and feel complete and whole as a Lesbian Woman. Unfortunately, I know not everyone is as lucky. I know for most of us that sharing who we are is a painful and sometimes isolating experience, and that is why finding a support system that nurtures and protects us is one of the most important facets of a healthy human being. My mother was a beautiful woman and if she were alive today I know she would be a proud mother of a Lesbian Woman, like so many friends and family that form PFLAG. Our support system is what makes us strong and helps us heal. To witness those we love the most in the world, fighting for our rights gives me goose bumps. There is no other love than someone standing up for you, letting the world know that who you are is important and deserves equality and a voice to be heard. Our support systems defines who we are and our environment, the less support the harder the journey. There are faceless people out in community that for no other reason then fairness stand beside you. Today, I want to thank all parents, family members, and friends who make that possible for us. PFLAG stands for Parents, Families and Friends of Lesbians and Gays (Bisexual, Transgender, and Queer). It has more than 200,000 members in over 500 communities in the USA. These individuals offer helplines, support groups, and resources for the Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender (LGBT) community. They work hard at promoting health and well-being, aid in ending discrimination, and help secure equal civil rights. Our Queen Bee and greatest supporter in Columbia is a Lady Harriet Hancock, she is the proud mother who started the PFLAG Chapter in Columbia, SC and helped push forward the Pride Movement in our beautiful city. Since learning of her son being gay she has worked hard to promote our rights and freedom. She is responsible for a lot of the advancement in our community here, we have a lot to be grateful for because of her. Being gay is not a choice, it is who we are, and it is our loving support systems that increase this awareness and self-worth within ourselves, our community and society. In a state that still has a negative view-point of what gay really means it is going to be the help of supportive friends and family that will ease the pain and move us forward. By educating our community, more doors can be opened, greater opportunities will lay ahead and we can create a safer environment for us to live in. Coming out is hard enough but it does not need to be isolating, pull on your community, your gay “Family”. In addition, for those parents and friends confused and at a loss there is an opportunity to learn and love your gay family member with support from organizations and individuals like Ms. Harriet Hancock. We all need to pull together it is what makes people stronger, we are all linked and there are multiple obstacles that attempt to drag down our community. We need to be conscious of our impact on each other and in our Global Community. We must stand visibly together, and you can start today by being kind and open towards each other! This article is dedicated to my mother, you were an amazing teacher and you are still helping me grow into a full person, even in death. I would also like to say to Ms. Harriet Hancock, thank you for all your help and support. Alex Karydi ~ The Lesbian Guru I am an Internationally Certified Drug and Alcohol Counselor that has been trained in Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual and Transgender LGBT related issues. I write for the Examiner as their Lesbian Relationship Expert and am a featured writer on SexGenderBody. My intention is to start a movement towards a healthier and more supportive community! Where LGBTs can find each other, learn from one another, and build a stronger support system. I, myself, am on a personal quest in discovery for a healthier gay relationship and self-fulfillment. Follow me on my Blog http://TheLesbianGuru.com or just Join The Lesbian Revolution of Health & Love on http://Facebook.com/TheFemmeGuru Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Alex_Karydi